Unix Beards

Daniel C. dcrookston at gmail.com
Mon Jul 7 15:25:39 MDT 2014

Dear Elders of the Internet,

It is my dream in life to one day be a Unix Guru.  I have been working very
hard on this dream job by locking myself in the basement with technical
manuals and Red Bull, and refusing to have a single razor in the house.
 I've been at it for six months now and I can perform any of several tasks
with my eyes closed, but my beard (while quite thick and curly) is still
only a modest 2.75 inches long.  It has remained at this length for the
past month and a half.

At this point I am beginning to fear that I will never have a true Unix
Beard.  May I still submit my application for Unix Guru, or will I forever
be cursed to live as a low-level functionary?


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